Wheat Paste
by Jingle'sBell
Summary: Some fun times in the Art Room... ZaDr  Rated T for implied naughtiness.


"Are you suuuure this "Pasted Wheat" is made out of grains and not your… human ickies?" The little Irken asked as he mushed the disturbing looking white substance between his fingers.

"It's wheat paste, Zim. Quit being a pervert."

"A purr what?"

"Just shut up and work." Zim's mouth sprung open to question the human on how he _DARED _speak to his future leader that way, but a glob of paste fell onto his lap, bringing his attention on Dib to an abrupt halt.

Dib couldn't help but roll his eyes at the poorly disguised alien. He, too, thought this "wheat paste" stuff was rather… gross. But at least he didn't say anything about it. Unlike Zim who had managed to question nearly everything in the art room. And who did he have to ask all these questions to? Dib, of course.

The alien had become almost unbelievably annoying ever since their little "truce" had sprung up. It had been nearly a month now, maybe? It felt like eternity to the poor human who was now subject to ALL of Zim's questions and random bouts of boredom. The questions he could handle, but when Zim got bored it was torture. He had grown this nasty habit of sneaking through Dib's window for "entertainment" at any hour of the day (or night). "Entertainment" usually meaning forcing Dib to stay up for hours on end discussing anything and everything that sparked Zim's interest.

"Hey Dib-stink?" Speak of the devil….

"What could you possibly want NOW, Zim?"

"Why is the stuff so… sticky?" He held the mess on his fingers up higher so his hidden antennas could get a whiff of it.

"It's like glue. It holds the newspaper strips together so the paper mache stuff doesn't fall apart."

"Why?" Geez, he was like a five-year-old.

"So… people can keep it longer? I don't know."

"Why?"

"Sometimes people like to keep the things they make."

"Wh-"

"Because they do, Zim! I don't know why! It's pretty I guess!" For once the Irken's mouth shut instead of continuously pestering Dib with useless questions. Dib sighed in relief. Quiet, finally.

Dib got back to work on his own little statue. So far, he didn't know what it was going to be. At the moment it just looked like a very lumpy stick made of newspaper and white goo.

Zim's paper mache statue was, to no surprise, himself. He hadn't gotten far, but it was already looking a little like a too-proud alien standing in a victory pose. Dib hated to admit it, but Zim _did _have a way with his hands when he truly tried. Not that he could paint or draw or anything. No, those still looked like a five-year-old had gotten into his parents secret pencil stash. But when it came to sculpting and the likes, he was good. He was no Michelangelo, but he was good enough to pass their art class. Dib… well… he liked to stick to his little doodles of Zim being dissected on operating tables. By this point he knew it would never happen, but a boy could dream.

With the small and most likely short-lived silence, Dib's mind began to wander. No matter how much he hated to think about it, he and Zim had grown almost close in the past month or so. Even through all the new annoyances.

After they had stopped trying to kill each other, they realized that there was a lot more in common between the two than they had ever bothered to notice. They still fought constantly, of course. But it was with well-placed words and insults rather than fists and explosions. And recently their "battles" had brought smiles instead of scowls to their faces. They could almost call each other… friends.

A loud "Aah!" sounded throughout the class room. Of course… the silence couldn't go on forever. No, that would be too easy.

Zim hastily shoved himself away from the table in shock and disgust. He stumbled out of his chair and stood, looking down at himself. White goo covered the front of his pants and ran down his legs. The remainder of the bucket was either dripping from his hands or filling up his seat.

Dib's eyes widened at the sight of his "friend" covered in wheat paste. Zim was right… it reeeaaaallly didn't look like normal paste… especially not when coating the alien boy's lap.

Laughter rang out through the class room. "Hey Zim," Dib cringed; he knew what was coming next. "You and the Crazy Kid having fun over there?" More laughter. Dib stayed quiet and silently pleaded for Zim to do the same. But why would Zim EVER do that?

"Fun? Eh…. Yes! Oh so much fun is Zim and the Dib-human having!" Oh no….

Everyone, even the calmer kids, was now erupted in a fit of laughter. Even though it was getting harder to lure the "foreign kid" into dirty jokes these days, it still happened constantly. Zim's mind had been slightly more corrupted since high school started, but he still didn't really catch on to any "innuendo" unless it was painfully obvious.

"Oh, we can all see that." Many eyes shifted down to Zim's hands and pants in extreme amusement.

"Zim," Dib whispered loudly. "Please just sit down!" Zim stared back at him with his usual scowl.

"What are the humans speaking about?"

"Just sit!" Zim huffed like a stubborn child that wasn't getting his way. And of course, he didn't sit.

Some guy whose name Dib didn't know leaned down on the desk between the two. "Hey, you guys care for one more?" His question ended in a series of kissy faces.

Zim tilted his head, staring at him with confusion for a few moments. His gaze shifted down to all the white stuff spread around him and table, then back to the human boy's lewd gestures. Nearly a minute later his face began to burn a bluish-purple and everyone in the class began to laugh again. Finally the foreign kid got the joke.

"Z-Zim is NOT doing… STUFF with the pig-smelly! That is… repulsive!" His face darkened with more of a blush. Seeing Zim's embarrassment, Dib's own face began to burn too.

"Awwww, the lovebirds are blushin'!"

"Shut your noise tubes!" Zim scooped up a large handful of wheat paste and proceeded to fling it full force at the other students. And the other students fought back. Before long the entire class room, and most of the students, was dripping with sticky white stuff. They would be in so much trouble when the teacher came back from the bathroom….

The door creaked open and there was a loud gasp. "ZIM! DIB!" Why did they always get blamed? It was almost always Zim's fault, true. But why Dib? He hadn't caused as much trouble since graduating to senior class. With a loud sigh, both human and alien responded at the same time.

"Yes, Mr. Wilkens?"

"You boys are going to stay after class and clean this entire room! Do you understand me!"

Zim mumbled to the side, "What is there not to understand when you screech like a flea-infested earth monkey?" Dib snorted a tiny bit. It was true… the big-eared, screechy-voiced, balding Mr. Wilkens resembled a monkey more than anyone would ever admit to his face.

"Well? I asked you two a question."

Zim gave a curt nod with a dull expression, which only served to annoy the angry man even more.

"Yes sir." Dib responded quickly before anything else was added onto their little prison sentence.

"Good!" With a glare, Mr. Wilkens stormed away to sit at his desk.

Dib groaned. Great, just what he needed; another day spent cleaning one of the school's many classrooms instead of doing something important like… well, something other than cleaning. Dib didn't really have much of a life outside of alien hunting. And ever since Zim had quit trying to take over, he had had no plans to foil and was ultimately bored. But at least Zim still came around. Wait, why was that a good thing again?

It wasn't long until the bell ran, signaling the end of class. Everyone ran for the doors wanting to make it to the bathroom before the others. Everyone except Zim and Dib. After another minute or two, Mr. Wilkens stood up from his desk and walked to the door. With back turned and hand on the door knob, he practically snarled at them.

"I'm going to eat my lunch. When I get back there better not be a SPECK of wheat paste left." With that he stormed out the door, as angry as a teacher whose classroom had nearly been destroyed by white goop. Oh wait…

"Is it just me or do teachers leave us alone on purpose so they can punish us more later?"

"Eh, probably. Your humans are stoopid like that." Dib opened his mouth to argue but sighed instead. It was bad when he started agreeing with his once nemesis.

"Let's just get this done and over with," Dib threw a dry clothe at the Irken's face. "And I am NOT doing all of it this time." Zim snatched the rag out of the air before it came close to hitting him. In his many battles with Dib, his reflexes had really improved. As had the human's.

"Aww, and why would ZIM do such a thing to the whiny human?" He asked with fake sympathy. Dib rolled his eyes, a habit that had taken over him more and more since the alien started being "nice" to him.

"When would you not, Zim?" He started scrubbing the wall that was most covered in the goo, not waiting for a reply.

"When you are doing it _wrong._" Zim flicked the lock on the door before extending his Pak legs. Each leg stabbed a sponge and began scrubbing while their owner lazily plopped down in a chair and smirked at the human.

"That's cheating, you show off." Dib glared at him and continued scrubbing.

"Says who? Zim has no rules." Stupid alien. If it wasn't for the fact that Zim made every single one of his many weapons by hand, Dib would wonder if the lazy creature had ever truly worked a day in his life. Then again, he wasn't really lazy. He had watched the Irken throw around enough energy to power the entire city in just one fist fight. Maybe, just maybe, Zim was actually smart? Nah, couldn't be.

Between the two, or five if you counted the metallic legs, the classroom was quickly cleaned and picked up.

"So…. We have twenty minutes left. What now?" Zim glanced up from flicking off the last sponge, a small glob of white clinging to his lip. Dib's eyes widened and, before he could help it, he burst into laughter.

"Z-Zim! Y-your mouth! Clean it off!" Zim tilted his head curiously at all the laughter and stuck out his tongue to lick off his lips. Ok, Dib had to admit…

He looked pretty hot.

It wasn't the first time this thought ran through his head. Unfortunately, it wouldn't be the last either. The first time he could ever remember feeling a slight attraction to Zim was when they had last truly fought. At one point Dib had stumbled and yanked the Irkens shirt down with him, leaving a huge tear through it. The huge rip revealed smooth green skin stuck on a lean frame, muscle layered underneath. It was around dusk and the large red eyes were nearly glowing. When Dib had looked up, admiration was the first thing that shot through his head, followed by a deep attraction to the body of his worst enemy.

When the round Irken tongue slipped back into its home, Dib couldn't help himself.

"Uh… you missed a spot." Zim frowned with childlike frustration and his snake-like tongue flickered out again. Dib stared as it made another, slower, round around the green lips. And for a second, only a second, he wondered what that tongue would feel like moving against his own- No! His thoughts were NOT going there! Not with Zim standing right in front of him.

"Did I get it?" Dib snapped back to reality. A small smile spread across his lips.

"No, try again." Zim groaned loudly.

"Then get it! The Dib-beast can see it, not Zim!" Dib laughed at Zim's frustration.

"Do I have to use my tongue too?" He asked in a teasing tone.

"Do not DARE touch ZIM with your nasty saliva."

"But I want to." Dib stuck his tongue out and wiggled it. What happened next was not only a surprise to the green alien, but also a surprise to the human himself.

With a crane of his neck, Dib moved forward and slid his tongue across sweet green lips.

Zim's eyes couldn't have gotten any wider. "D-Dib-stink!"

"Uh… That was just… I-I was… er…" Dib stuttered, no logical words coming to his mind at the moment. So Zim glared.

"What was THAT for?"

"That was… um… what humans call… grooming? You had something on your mouth! I was just getting it of-"

"I am not STUPID, huumaaan! Zim knows what a kiss is."

"That wasn't a kiss! It was… uh…" What had he just called it? His mind was already blank.

"You kissed Zim." Zim interrupted in a strange tone. He didn't sound mad, but then again, he didn't sound too happy either.

"Well…." Dib sighed. He might as well give in now before he managed to make everything extremely complicated as usual. "….yeah…."

"Why?" Great, another round of twenty questions. But this time it was much more personal.

"I just… um… I wanted to?"

"Of course. Who WOULDN'T want to kiss Zim? But why?" There were lots of people that wouldn't want to kiss Zim. But Dib was NOT going to say that. He valued his life.

"Just… Just because!" Dib crossed his arms stubbornly. That was the only answer Zim was going to get out of him.

Zim smirked a little. "I think I liked it."

Whoa... wait, what! Since when did Zim learn how to play flirt? Or… was he being serious? Dib tried to respond but just couldn't find the words.

"Uh…"

"I does not surprise me. The Dib has been staring at Zim a lot lately…"

"You're lying!" Oh no… he was even starting to sound like Zim! The alien simply shrugged.

"ZIM is not lying. It is not MY fault you are giving off mating pheromones every time I get too close to you."

"Ma- what?"

"Mating pheromones," Zim leaned in close to Dib's face, smirking the whole time. "You want Zim." He really did…. Especially when those green lips were only inches away and puffed out in an almost kissy face. Dib chewed on his own lip, staring down at the closeness of their bodies. This was going to kill him to say. But he may as well get it over with.

"I… kind of… really do…." Zim's gaze turned feral.

"I know." He lunged forward with an animalistic grin, trapping Dib against a desk and his body. Dib's mind was reeling. How had this happened again? He should've known better than to let his guard down! How long had Zim been secretly planning this attack? It WAS an attack, right? He raised an arm to block whatever swing Zim was going to make.

"Zim! I thought we had a tru-!" Words were cut off by a pair of green lips slammed into a pair of pink ones. Honey gold eyes widened beyond the rim of his huge glasses. Zim was… he was…. It felt so good.

Was it possible that Zim's mind had been much more corrupt than Dib imagined? Was the "innocence" just a façade? No time to think.

His lips moved back against Zim's in a desperate, needy way. Dib had never known how much he really wanted this until the very moment it happened.

Zim took over completely, pressing the human's body back until he was laying on the desk, lips never parting. Dib finally pulled his head back to gasp and pant.

"Z-Zim I…" Another kiss.

"Shut up human." A gloved hand reached down to the boy's pant's zipper, causing those golden eyes to widen again.

"Wait… I-in the classroom!"

"What is a little more pasty stuff to clean up?"


End file.
